Lemon #15. Let the other person do of talking
Must people trying to win others to their way of thinking do too much talking themselves. Let the other people talk themselves out. They know more about their business and problems than you do. So ask them questions. Let them tell you a few things.
If you disagree with them you may be tempted to interrupt. But don’t. It’s dangerous. They won’t pay attention to you while they still have a lot of ideas of their own crying for expression. So listen patiently and with an open mind. Be sincere about it. Encourage them to express their ideas fully.
Even our friends would much rather talk to us about their achievements than listen to us boast about ours.
La Rochefoucauld, the French philosopher, said: «If you want enemies, excel your friends; but if you want friends, let your friends excel you.»
Now, when we have some time to chat, I ask them to share their joys with me, and I only mention my achievements when they ask. So, let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Dale Carnegie @ How to win friends and influence people.