Lemon #9. How to make
like you instantly
There’s one all-important law of human conduct. if we obey that law, we shall almost never get into trouble. If obeyed, it’ll bring us countless friends and constant happiness. But the very instant we break the law, we shall get into endless trouble. The law is this: Always make the other person feel important.
Remember, the desire to be important is the deepest urge in the human nature. William James said: «The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated».
You want the approval of those with whom you come in contact. You want recognition of your true worth. You want a feeling that you’re important in your little world. You don’t want to list to cheap, insincere flattery, but you do crave sincere appreciation. So, let’s obey the Golden Rule and give unto other what we would have other give unto us. All the time, everywhere. Little phrases such as «I’m sorry to trouble you», «Would you be so kind as to…», «Would you mind.?», «Thank you» – little courtesies like these oil the cogs of the monotonous grind of everyday life.
The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely.
Talk to people about themselves and they’ll listen to you for hours.
Dale Carnegie @ How to win friends and influence people.